shit's hella cutty

2008-02-29T00:18:00.000-08:00

it started out as most of these things do - in a blur.
seriously the sky the morning we left was like a rendering level of a survival horror video game for playstation 2. silent hill 2 to be specific, but i think thats getting sidetracked.

katrina rented a car for a roadtrip to san diego, and i was obliged to drive her there. a couple of wrong turns, 8 hours, 52 mix cds, a shared bowl of split pea soup, 7 plays of 'crank dat' by soulja boy and decided upon band name later we were crashing on yajaira's studio floor off university and fourth (over by the 7-11, for all you stalkers out there)

we should have been miserable waking up on the floor, but since we were up "early" (1pm) the day before, we had slept soundly. i took an extra long shower and sampled all 30 of yajaira's pink plastic packaged shower products. around 2 we were ready to hit the town. we returned the rental and met with the infamous kevin parme. we stood on concrete road dividers in an attempt of catching a bay view, and shared a cigarette break before headed out to lunch at pokez. catching up was nice, talking shit was better. burritos were good and pocketing chocolates at his parents house was the real winner of the afternoon activities for me. sorry kevin.

then we had to meet up with talia. shoot me in the head. dealing with time and phones or anything with numbers really is an unreasonable pain in the ass with katrina. i got to see talia first while sipping on free sympathy coffee at peets . She promptly started complaining about god knows what and all i could see were pit stains and why on earth was she stretching in a coffee shop? yajaira came to save me soon thereafter and we booked it over to fashion valley to meet with the always lovely taylor johnson. i put on an impromptu caffeine fueled fashion show in the jeanery where taytrack works, consisting of XXL sweaters and the smallest sized european denim the store had to offer.

we cooked dinner at yaya's, rolled to joe's, crashed, and woke up for: TOFU HOUSE. everyday i get on my knees and thank the korean gods for blessing this earth with their free limitless appetizers. a totem pole is erected in my driveway with large wooden cucumber slices, fishcake, pickled radish and kimchee supporting each other to the heavens. following this boiling-hot-in-the-pot-as-you-eat-it gorgefest, holding our bellies, we saunter over slowly to green tea cafe in the same strip mall for supercharged coffee boba and mango strawberry smoothies. theres a dj playing post "jump" kriss kross and its blowing my mind. or the all the sugar syrup is.

we pick up kball from talias. and spend the afternoon lollygaggying at joe's. many hours are wasted dedicated to cable television. when i finally unglue my eyes its time for dinner at my parents, but not before swinging by yajairas to find that she is crying, wasted and with company: NICHOLE GAWALIS and taylor johnson. we hug a hundred times promise to return shortly. dinner with my parents is serious business, this everyone in town knows by now, jealous, they let us go, returning to their tall can, wine and vodka buffet.

SHABU SHABU

Shabu-shabu (Japanese: しゃぶしゃぶ), also spelled syabu-syabu, is a Japanese variant of hot pot. The dish is related to sukiyaki in style, where both use thinly sliced meat and vegetables, and usually served with dipping sauces. However, it is starkly different in taste; shabu-shabu is more savory and less sweet than sukiyaki. It is considered a winter dish but is eaten year-round.

thats what wikipedia had to offer. but god damn you can not begin to describe this fucking meal. tiers of food. tiers. a million varieties of texture and taste ALL/RIGHT/THERE/. i die inside everytime i have it and ive eaten it a million times since childhood, and always, always on chinese new year. when my mom has it in her head to make this shit she suggests it like a roomate persuading you to do coke at a houseparty. like its some evil idea and she already knows youre going to say yes and saying its name is only giving you the heads up on the what path youre about to go down... "so... i was thinking... shabushabu?" yeah, fucking DUH.

after this greatness we return to the land of a thousand beers and tears. yajaira is piss ass drunk yelling at everyone, absolutely no one is taking her seriously and for the most part having a good time. the cause of drama this evening is a phone call mishap with an exboyfriend (yajaira is moving to palm springs in less than a week, trying to say a decent goodbye... somewhere along the lines in goes haywire). but no complaints about it man! because here as her emotional support squad we have nelson who i havent seen in YEARS, knoxer the homie from sf, ivy, tay and sommer, nichole, nelsons cousin, myself, joe and kball and 3 18-packs, 3 bottles of red and all kinds of alcohol scraps.

breakfast in the morning was AMAZING. my mom whipped up a whole slew of steam dim sum treats for me and everything katrina missed at tofu house- except better, of course. my mom using her csi skills discovered that im smoking, sadness briefly sweeps the land until i realize i can start smoking in the backyard instead of in secret on the rain-soaked balcony .

after b-fast i drop katrina off somewhere in balboa park so she can watch talia do some circus shit at a community center. i pick up knox godoy and we cruise out to yajaira and joes armed with industrial sized garbage bags to pick up the fallen soldiers from their respective living rooms. all the while my mom is slicing the limbs of a live crab in the sink. 6:30 rolls around i trade knox for joe, pick up katrina and return home to feast. spicy stirfry seafood and a "splendiferous array" of veggies.

after dinner, i try to use vulcan mindpowers to get my parents to let me bring the shot machine to joes house. the shot machine consists of five whiskey bottles, upside down on a spinning platform, when you tap the bottom of the bottle it dispenses... the perfet shot!

2008-02-05T13:16:00.000-08:00

in most recent news:
jason got an apartment in manhattan
im moving to new orleans
the new rambo is hella tight

and, im dating this guy:

2008-01-27T15:28:00.000-08:00

im 23 years old.
i dont have a job. i dont go to school.
i have five dollars to my name.

this morning a tattooed mexican punker brought me a tray of cookies i baked last night in a drunken daze and a carton of milk. i am not sleeping with this person. when my nails dry, im bringing the remaining cookies to a tattoo shop that i sell books at, and later tonight theres going to be an art show at my house.

i guess i have nothing to complain about.

touché.

2008-01-25T16:19:00.000-08:00

have you tried oreo cakesters? they are fucking crazzzzzzy. but im stopping
WHAT THE FUCK!
you eat that shit?
i dont know what i was thinking
dude, im sorry...
i dont normally!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
but i will NEVER try that. it looks like diabetes in a box
you say that now
do you know whats in that? LARD. straight lard and cake.
you ate the 7-11 cheeseburger hotdog so dont talk shit!

nichole gawalis emily jaworski

2008-01-25T13:57:00.000-08:00

2008-01-21T02:35:00.000-08:00

today was in the top 100.
my mind is reeling

2008-01-19T19:51:00.000-08:00

i just ate spiced lamb shoulder, half an apple and a glass of skim milk
i need something to do, but more importantly i need something to be
im anxious

2008-01-19T00:56:00.000-08:00

"the weight of his hand is strong- like a machete
cold steel moonlight with blood rust flakes."
-gabriel atlov

2008-01-19T00:55:00.000-08:00

i want to go somewhere where i can swim down a river with a knife in my mouth

2008-01-17T14:12:00.000-08:00

there are certain choices that man makes that have always perplexed me
things i shall never understand

for example, why do the obese insist on wearing mini backpacks?
who in their right mind invented and then sanctioned the production of single-ply toilet paper?
and why for the love of god, did gilmore girls have to go off the air?

2008-01-14T16:35:00.000-08:00

so the cats at anubis warpus asked me to make a new zine and participate in another
i have mad shit to throw on the website
and thousands of little projects i have been pining to work on
not to mention a new sewing machine

however it seems all productivity in my life has come to a halt and will not resume again until i have seen every last episode of the gilmore girls. a job that i have taken on full time, devoting literal hours per day and speaking to no one, leaving my house only to shuffle to the liquor store in my paint stained sweatpants and poncho, which is half a block away.

except for the weekend taylor was here where we stayed up all night, drove to san jose, visited dave choes new warehouse and rottweiler, saw there will be blood, went salsa dancing, got free drinks and created the best podcast ever.

i watched six hours yesterday to make up for lost time.

2008-01-05T17:24:00.001-08:00

http://www.yougotaquarter.com

2007-12-28T01:31:00.001-08:00

yeah! i exercized! dja see how hard i nodded my head to that beat this morning? shit.

2007-12-22T04:02:00.000-08:00

you gonna go home and try to bone down?
yeah im gonna need the jaws of life though
for some reason i thought you said 'im gonna make her jealous of life though'

2007-12-20T05:38:00.001-08:00

fo the nine quad

2007-12-20T04:45:00.000-08:00

apostrophize: (v) to place an apostrophe within a grammatical error which did previously not contain the necessary punctuation

origin: english, 2007 will jameson

ex: apostrophize that shit.

2007-12-20T04:39:00.000-08:00

you guys should be proud of yourselves
because someone created something to destroy us
and we destroyed it.

bill james

2007-12-18T19:47:00.000-08:00

i have just returned from vegas, first class, all expenses paid.
charging it to the game wednesday through friday, and spending saturday and sunday with kevin and nichole who happened to be in town for the bjork show. i may have fallen in love with a stunningly handsome mexican boy that worked at the urban outfitters there. time will tell if i will be returning for an elvis presley wedding.

wednesday through sunday. a hell of a time to be trapped in the desert.
this week joseph clark gunnon will be spending the equivalent time under my care in the city by the bay.
cant wait.

then san diego
then la
then the world.

you could have been down

2007-12-06T03:59:00.000-08:00

today i racked
today i got hit by a car
today i watched as the house across the street was fully engulfed in flames
today i bro'ed out with a cop
today i bought wine instead of lunch
today i
today i watched a horror movie snuck in brew with the skate homies
today i got kissed on the cheek by a record store clerk

so today was pretty good.

2007-11-29T01:58:00.000-08:00

does your mom buy you haterade at costco?

just out of the shower

2007-11-28T04:28:00.001-08:00

things i dont like about other people tend to represent problems within myself that i dont realize.

2007-11-28T04:08:00.000-08:00

havent updated this for awhile
not very motivated to it seems
seeing as ive told all of two people in the entire world about it
and of those two people, i only know one of them

so, lets go with superficial events!
car accident. nice. hit my head pretty hard
started throwing up randomly in the middle of the day a few days (today) later.

kevin and jason are in town and ive been acting remote and disconnected which fucking sucks because i love them and they are in my favorite people in the universe top ten.

my head hurts
my head hurts

2007-11-18T17:10:00.000-08:00

so the crazy roberston thing has blown the fuck up
ive made a few shirt designs that im showing the boys thanksgiving weekend.
kitsons already sold out
theyve already been picked up by a few more boutiques in beverly
talks with barneys new york later this week

i could go on and say we were on mtv, cbs and the la news, but um. that would be excessive. though entirely true! fuck yes, i love my homies.

ill post some new pictures later tonight.

crazy robertson.

2007-11-15T02:47:00.000-08:00

so. i made this website for my friends company
and it was featured in the wall street journal.
and 17,000 people have seen it in the past 24hrs.

www.crazyrobertson.com.

thats pretty nice.

future companions!

2007-11-06T23:36:00.000-08:00

as expected

2007-11-05T23:46:00.001-08:00

still down in socal, beyond my projected vacation time.

three moments that made it all worth it:

1) dancing to ratatat in a cleared wing of the japanese art museum in LA while dave painted an 80 foot mural all in krylon ultra flat black, with a respirator on and a mouthful of chocolate cookies because clement, the ocd curator didnt allow food in the gallery, while the museum staff caught flicks with their camera phones

2) being shoved in a bathroom with saber, retna, three brazillian girls, joseph gunnon, yajira, and some dude that kept making fart noises, while hotel security searched the room and tried to break up the party that dave had thrown at the standard.

3) the sunrise on the drive home , bathed in lavender light while oncoming traffic moved like yellow ghosts, their headlights still on from the follow evening which existed only moments ago, exhausted from speech, sweat and alcohol consumption and donning two orchids in my ear from the flower arrangement yajira beat to death with her purse in the lobby of the westin.

and the thousands in between. and the three hundred dollars.

2007-10-29T19:38:00.000-07:00

so i have these green tea 'dietary supplement' tablets that im completely addicted to, and i might as well call them my "bad decision pills" because everytime i take one, they make me feel incredibly well balanced, satiated and enthusiastic at the same time. which isnt bad, but when i am in that state, i always finding myself saying "why not?" to pretty much any suggestion thrown my way.

case in point, i just signed on for a southern california/las vegas roadtrip adventure with my homie davíd that leaves tomorrow afternoon and returns sunday night. just in time for the double kegger called katrina kiapou's birthday extravaganza.

2007-10-28T06:33:00.000-07:00

6:27 am and i cant sleep
the liquor store on the corner opens up in 33 minutes.

2007-10-25T00:01:00.000-07:00

my mother is taiwan
my brother is in brooklyn
my dad is in san diego, and just got back from miami

likka sto shoes

2007-10-22T04:33:00.000-07:00

this morning i plucked my eyebrows and ran to get coffee from the liquor store whilst still in my pjs.

i spent the afternoon watching in semistoned disbelief as tons wolslagel (see above) cleaned up my living room. i met tons (fort meyers, florida) through knox (long beach, ca) whom i met through shane (baton rougue, louisiana). all of which i find to be amazing human beings. and amazing speakers! i love their accents and insights. the flick was taken by knox the first night i really got to kick it with them. it was approaching dawn and we had about 9 episodes of twilight zone and two tall cans under our belt, which is an easy way of saying we became friends fast.

i got the homie a slice of pizza and he dip/setted out to work, i came home and finished the menu for the crazy robertson website before 10 o'clock.

joe text messaged me about narwhals.

i then cleaned my room for about two hours as shane talked about himself the whole time.

after my room was at a respectable level, and shane had left, i pulled out the jacket i ran away to beverly hills in a year and nine months ago. damn. didnt know that till i typed it. but anyway. i took out an exacto blade and peeled off two of the external pockets, realigned the buttons to make the fit more flattering and added a fur collar. i have to say im quite satisfied with the results, though i look like a female aviator from world war 1. emilia airheart. i put on my rusky style method man cap and the looked set for oncoming winter. im part russian, and i adore their hats.

i wish i could dress like that everyday without looking like im in costume.

ok ciao bellas.

2007-10-20T20:09:00.000-07:00

i am officially committing to not leaving the house for three days.

lets see what happens.

2007-10-17T17:56:00.000-07:00

its been a nice winter afternoon of nothing.
i just talked to taylor johnson for the first time in days who regaled me with a tale of nelson knocking out a bum as steve was inside a shop getting '1904' tattooed in old english on his forearms, and that whole scene is nothing but solid.

ugod

2007-10-15T11:36:00.000-07:00

everything was so much better when i was a drug addict.

los zapatos negros

2007-10-14T16:18:00.000-07:00

sígame dondequiera voy
y me encuentra antes llego

since we last spoke
i still have not slept
so consider this an extension of my last post
in that the piled on activities that constitute a day has yet to be halted and therefore im still going on the same oozing stream of thought.
maybe thats what sleep is good for
stopping you from becoming overly crazy and too you.

for the record the lack of sleep has not been substance induced
though i almost wish it was.

people that skip a night or two of sleep time and again have to be much more interesting than those that dont. and i dont feel that saying that is an unfair judgement. think of the lives of people that dont sleep due to physical conditions or mental. no matter what, its always straining, even when youve accepted that its just not going to happen.

and i just cant imagine ever really knowing parts of yourself without insomnia. because sure you can be alone during the day, but when that carries on into the night, and past the point of the possibility of contact because the rest of the immediate world is enjoying something together... thats a different kind of alienation. and introspection.

maybe thats why drug addicts get along so well
and why so many people like the internet

they dont have to really look at themselves

god or gypsies hate me and have cursed me with the scanner from hell
pray for me or bust some voodoo shit and maybe
it will magically realign its parts
and become the shit.

cherry post

2007-10-14T04:29:00.001-07:00

fucking christ its cold in my room
its always fucking cold in my room
and strewn with completely worthless or outdated shit.
theres beverage containers claiming every available flat surface.

things that are important, or need to be kept in high visibility (i.e. keys, "wallet piles" as i do not actually have a wallet, cell phone etc.) battle for optical attention against abandoned garage sale must-haves, shreds of paper, and plastic pieces of kitsch in every color variety that plastic now comes in.

my room is also home to a population of ten billion articles of clothing, all of which i hate.

this is my first post and already im on a rant. swell. just fucking swell. peeeach.

its been ups and downs all week; i know im not bipolar but i swear to god life sure is.

within the past 48 hours i have murdered sf on my bmx with shane constantly at my heels on his board, jumped hella fences, taken pictures of a man smoking crack on a church stoop, and watched about 93 episodes of the office. ive eaten like a goddamn retard at hometown buffet on his birthday and i think... yes, i have been surprisingly sober the entire time. no.. i think i was drunk while taking those pictures. YES. i have these vague recollections of yelling into derek's toilet bowl later that night, with half a shirt on and contemplating sleeping on the floor, and since most of my hallucinated memories are incredibly fantastical or at the very least shed me in a better light, im going to say that it's a real one.

i should have started the preceding paragraph with 'within the past 72 hours' because then i could have talked about how amazing it was to see bat for lashes, and how horrible it was to see the man that opened for her. so horrible that i spent his entire set physically hurting myself or trying to swipe deep fried appetizers from an after hours stock analyst every time he turned his head.

i made out with four onion rings by the time natasha took the stage.

from the darkroom tonight: